Social media can really give people the wrong idea. This is a testament to the whole picture. I lead the most blessed and happy life I can imagine. But I want to share the part of me that has been behind the scenes. I did not intentionally hide this because it didn’t look good… I didn’t even know how to share it with my family and closest friends…or even myself. But I think when we put forward only our best moments, photos and views it tells others that they should be doing, feeling, seeing things like that all the time too. I want to continue to be positive, because that’s me. But I think it’s so important as social media becomes such a big part of our culture …to be real. I am currently back in school to be able to facilitate all sorts of diagnostic health tests. Here is why.
Starting about ten +/- years ago, my health took a seemingly inexplicable downhill turn. Before that, I had basically never been sick and could “push through” almost any challenge whether physical, mental or emotional and come out good on the other end. At the time, I owned a fashion boutique in La Jolla and was working over 70 hours a week for five years. So I admittedly didn’t have the tools or the time to respond to the mysterious change very gracefully. As things (sometimes gradually and sometimes abruptly) got worse, I made some huge mistakes that hopefully I can help others avoid.
Because I always thought “I’m sure everything will be fine”, it wasn’t until five years later that I finally got some tests and found out the beginning of the story that was to unravel what I now call my Health Adventure.
Well it’s been five years since then and a lot has gone down. I definitely felt afraid and admit that in scared moments wondered if something was inherently wrong with me. Well there was… just not in the way that I sometimes feared. I have genetic mutations that don’t allow me to “de-tox” like other people. I have had this my whole life but it didn’t cause too much of a problem until just the right storm of events happened(enter blastocystis hominis- a parasite I got in Oaxaca about ten years ago but didn’t know at the time), and a lot of emotional stress and overworking. Every detail isn’t important, but that unhealed issue turned into debilitating migraine headaches for a while, then stomach and several auto-immune issues, longstanding pneumonias and very low energy. Just recently I found out that the heavy metals in my body are extremely high. This is why even the antibiotics didn’t kill the parasite…they are counteracted by heavy metals. All of this combined has put my adrenal glands in Stage III exhaustion and my stomach sIG level at .01 when a thriving range looks about 60.
Now that I understand and have finally gotten to the bottom of the real issue behind it all(the underlying detox issue is actually quite easy to handle and supplement once you are aware of it), I can see it as a blessing…because I know the whole process with all its twists and turns is molding me to be a better person to help others.
Back in the day when I just started dealing with it all, I learned to do all the right things: clean eating, supplements, finding great health practitioners and doctors, yoga, daily meditation…habits that I will have for life…I even sold my store and created a balanced and peaceful life doing what I love: helping people. I went to Boulder and started “Rolfing”, took nutrition school (IIN based in New York) while I was working and learned how to heal myself instead of looking for others to do it for me. I got control of some auto-immune issues that all the doctors told me would just get worse. I learned the importance of food and personal love and self care. I was happy inside but I knew something was still wrong. In fact, it seemed to get worse in certain ways.
Since those tests I have been to many many doctors (both medical and natural), acupuncture, energetic healing, taken a bagazillion (that’s so many it’s not even a number anymore)supplements, natural protocols, when those didn’t work- antibiotics, when those didn’t work- more natural options…when those didn’t work- triple strength antibiotics four times in a row….what?!!! I have felt confused, sad, overwhelmed, angry… but most of all alone. Here I was doing all the right things and still not feeling well. I didn’t share this information with anyone because I didn’t know how to make any sense of it myself. I didn’t really tell anyone until about a year ago when things got so bad I basically didn’t have an option.
Most people, even my closest family members and friends, were and still are confused and don’t know how to react because I don’t have one issue that comes with a specific label. People, especially the medical industry, really want to label things so you can get the pertaining drugs prescribed. This is great for symptoms. But to heal most things, including ones with labels(which I have some of those too), a lot more is involved. And that means understanding all the processes of your body, how they function….and how they HEAL and thrive. Most people don’t have the time, drive or energy to go this deep in today’s world. I was forced to, THANK GOD.
I have been working on gaining a target audience on social media: caring people who prioritize their health and the health of those that they love. I am doing this to be able to share my story, hopefully inspire someone out there in some small or big way, but also one day (hopefully sooner than later) be able to offer anyone out there that isn’t feeling well some assistance getting out of feeling “off” before it gets worse. Stress is behind most illnesses, and this doesn’t have to be “stress” at work like we conventionally see it.. it can be emotional, food sensitivities/allergies, environmental, chemical or mycotoxins…processes going on inside your body that you might not even feel until they have already caused quite a bit of harm.
If I had just gotten tested after being so sick in Oaxaca!!! But I was younger. And more stubborn. But for every twist and turn my process has taken me, no matter how painful, I say thank you. Because it has helped me learn and care about things I never would have learned or cared about before. And this is building me to be able to help even more. I was stubborn, impatient and to be blunt did not respond well to people that were sick or didn’t feel well. I wanted them to “buck up” or get over it and sometimes even thought it was in the person’s head. Well karma (or whatever you want to refer to it as) KICKED ME IN THE ASS. “That person” has become me. This has all happened for a reason. I was given the challenges that got me and my hard-headed self to the point where I can’t “buck up” and get over it. I did that for years and now I surrender to what is…with gratitude.
Many people that are helping others every day need help the most but don’t know how to get it or how to make the time. We get so good or focused on helping others that we forget or never learn how to truly take care of ourselves. This can mean health practitioners and healers… but also mothers, fathers, bosses, managers, etc etc.
The best practitioners, in my opinion, have normally gone through some sort of struggle themselves and have figured out(to some extent) their own puzzle and then are able to help others with a full capacity. When these people fall behind as all of us humans do, they take the time and space to recalibrate and re-set. I fee like I have learned this with my own body as far as pushing it and injuries go and in my Rolfing practice, but I still strive and am on the path to be one of these type of Nutritional Counselors.
I am taking a few weeks off teaching yoga, work and school to take a step back… But it’s actually a giant step forward in self-care. Rest, rejuvenation and play are the main focus. I used to be so scared to let anyone know that I wasn’t doing well. I didn’t want to make people feel uncomfortable. But sharing things like this hopefully makes other people know they are not alone. If you aren’t feeling well and don’t know exactly what is wrong, have been eating well and doing all the right things and had people tell you that you are “fine” and “everything looks normal”… I want you to know that I can soon help you. We can dig deeper and look at the whole picture together. Not quite yet, as I am taking the biggest move ever towards my own healing and that is making sure I am on the up side of things before I start taking on more.
In the name of authenticity, one of the biggest motivations in getting feeling my best is so that I can help any of YOU out there that don’t feel your best but might be confused why, what’s going on or what to do. I promise I will use what I have learned in this process to better help you and/or your loved ones when the time is right and with a much greater compassion than I ever would have been able to had I not gone through all of this.
BIG LOVE. #beyourself #findanewangle #weareallblessed